Our Journey (Pt. 2)
As we started trying to conceive, we kept trying to justify not getting pregnant by staying aware of everything we were dealing with. Dan was on dialysis at home, which was a huge blessing, but still a huge inconvenience, annoyance, and stress in our lives. We ended up buying a house that spring, so we were fixing it up and moving at the same time. We were making trips to St. Louis to go to Barnes and get testing done to get on the transplant list. It was a crazy time.
Most months, we couldn't "try" because we were just so busy with everything else. By this I just mean that many months we were not tracking ovulation or counting days. We knew we wanted a baby, but we were just going to see what happened. At least, that's what we told ourselves. There were months when I tracked things better just to start getting an idea of my cycle and what to expect.
We made a lot of excuses. We tried to realize that during such a stressful time, it probably wasn't in God's plan for us to have a baby during this time. We had dear friends who lost their baby at 37 weeks gestation the summer of 2017, so again I felt like I could see a little part of God's plan. I couldn't have been there for our sweet friends if I had been pregnant at the time.
To get really real, we were also struggling as a couple during the time. We were fighting much more than we ever had before. We started seeing a counselor, briefly, just to learn how to cope and kind of be reassured that with the stress of everything in our lives, it was normal to have that stress taken out on each other. We saw how difficult times like that can pull marriages apart rather than together.
After Dan's transplant, we knew we wanted to get very serious about trying to get pregnant. Again, we had been trying for about a year, but we knew that with all of the circumstances, the timing may not have been right.
In January 2018, we knew it had been a year since we started trying, but we put off going to see doctors, just to give it a few more months now that Dan was much healthier. In May, I talked to my OBGYN about our difficulty getting pregnant and was referred to a specialist. However, after discussing it together, we decided to hold off on seeing a specialist. We wanted to talk to Dan's doctors first to see if this could be related to his kidney disease. We were very discouraged because they did not offer any sort of help, but just told us that yes, fertility can decrease when on dialysis so we needed to "give it time" before we worried about it.
Now that we are almost at 1 year out from transplant, we are ready to move forward in our journey. We are hurting. We are praying, and we ask that you join us in prayer. Pray that we can know what steps we need to take next. Pray that we find the right doctors. Pray for our support system during this time as they have to hear all of my crazy frustrations. Pray for our baby.
Most months, we couldn't "try" because we were just so busy with everything else. By this I just mean that many months we were not tracking ovulation or counting days. We knew we wanted a baby, but we were just going to see what happened. At least, that's what we told ourselves. There were months when I tracked things better just to start getting an idea of my cycle and what to expect.
We made a lot of excuses. We tried to realize that during such a stressful time, it probably wasn't in God's plan for us to have a baby during this time. We had dear friends who lost their baby at 37 weeks gestation the summer of 2017, so again I felt like I could see a little part of God's plan. I couldn't have been there for our sweet friends if I had been pregnant at the time.
To get really real, we were also struggling as a couple during the time. We were fighting much more than we ever had before. We started seeing a counselor, briefly, just to learn how to cope and kind of be reassured that with the stress of everything in our lives, it was normal to have that stress taken out on each other. We saw how difficult times like that can pull marriages apart rather than together.
After Dan's transplant, we knew we wanted to get very serious about trying to get pregnant. Again, we had been trying for about a year, but we knew that with all of the circumstances, the timing may not have been right.
In January 2018, we knew it had been a year since we started trying, but we put off going to see doctors, just to give it a few more months now that Dan was much healthier. In May, I talked to my OBGYN about our difficulty getting pregnant and was referred to a specialist. However, after discussing it together, we decided to hold off on seeing a specialist. We wanted to talk to Dan's doctors first to see if this could be related to his kidney disease. We were very discouraged because they did not offer any sort of help, but just told us that yes, fertility can decrease when on dialysis so we needed to "give it time" before we worried about it.
Now that we are almost at 1 year out from transplant, we are ready to move forward in our journey. We are hurting. We are praying, and we ask that you join us in prayer. Pray that we can know what steps we need to take next. Pray that we find the right doctors. Pray for our support system during this time as they have to hear all of my crazy frustrations. Pray for our baby.
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